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Global Warning - Dec 18, 2008 - Printable Version
- I'M SORRY
by Robin Buckallew
It seems everybody is apologizing these days. When did it all start? I can’t exactly remember – perhaps it started with the apology to Galileo Galilei made by Pope John Paul II on behalf of the Catholic Church. It was a really touching, meaningful gesture, especially since by that time Galileo had been dead for 350 years. Not to be outdone, the Church of England has recently apologized to Charles Darwin for misunderstanding his theory and therefore opposing it. This was, of course, even more meaningful, since Darwin has only been dead 125 years. The Pope quickly followed that up with an announcement that the Vatican wasn’t going to apologize to Darwin for misunderstanding and failing to appreciate his theory, since they understood it. They also didn’t oppose his theory, at least not once 130 years had passed since it was expostulated. Other apologies, of course, include the apology of the American government to the former slaves for slavery. Again, most of them are quite dead, but of course, their ancestors live on, so they’re given a sincere, heartfelt apology – no money goes with that, but an apology so heartfelt, well, that’s got to mean something, right? The Australian government has apologized to the children who were the offspring of the white settlers and the natives, who were stolen from their parents and trained to serve the settlers. Everybody’s apologetic, everybody’s happy….there are, however, a number of apologies that have not been made, and I see no likelihood that they are forthcoming in the near future, so I think I’ll make those apologies myself. My first apology is to my readers, who may realize that some of my apologies are directed to those who are not yet dead, but I’m sure you’ll forgive me for such a gauche breach of etiquette, since my apology is at least as heartfelt and sincere as the ones mentioned above, and I’m sort of new to this international diplomacy role. First of all, I’d like to apologize to the dodo. The dodo, an inoffensive, quiet little bird, just minding it’s own business on its own little island, not noticing the rest of the world going by around it. Suddenly, in 1598, Homo sapiens arrived on the island of Mauritius, at that time the home of the dodo, and the dodo, in its innocence, wasn’t frightened of humans, didn’t run and hide, and as a result of its trusting nature, was extinct in less than 100 years, by 1681 (less than 40 years after the death of Galileo). The dodo had the distinct disadvantage of being ugly (at least by human standards), and therefore worthy of nothing but being killed. I apologize, with all my heart, as sincerely as it is possible for any human being to apologize, to the dodo, who had the unlucky fate of becoming the very symbol of extinction.
I would next like to apologize to the moa, a large flightless bird related to the ostrich, which was unfortunate enough to be tasty. They once inhabited the island nation of New Zealand, but were rapidly eaten to extinction following human settlement. Some accounts give a rate of extinction of only a couple of decades – a testament to what humans can do to a species even without the massive, oil-burning, emissions-spewing monster machines we use today. To the moa, I would like to say, I’m sorry, and I wish you were still here with us today to receive my apology in person…oops, I mean in bird.
To the passenger pigeon, I would like to apologize. Once numbering in the billions in North America, the skies would turn dark as they flew overhead, blocking out the sun. Hunted relentlessly in the early days of white settlement, the last known passenger pigeon living in the wild was shot in 1900. The last remaining passenger pigeon in captivity, a bird named Martha, died in the Cincinnati Zoo in 1914. For this species, there was no one single cause of demise. Overhunting, coupled with destruction of the habitat, conspired to wipe out this once fabulous species forever. All I can say, in utter helplessness, is I’m so sorry. You deserved better.
To the Quagga, relative of the zebra, I would like to say I’m sorry. You were forced to move aside to make room for more “valuable” species, such as sheep and goats, and we just couldn’t make room for you. The 1880s were a particularly bad decade for you quaggas, since it was the end of your existence as a species, dying in 1883 in the Amsterdam zoo, a lonely remnant of a once proud species that roamed free in what is now South Africa. Please accept my apology, on behalf of my oblivious species.
To the Steller’s Sea Cow, we owe you an apology. I suppose we could blame the victim, and put your demise on you for being tasty, but I refuse to stoop so low. You probably didn’t choose to be a tasty morsel for human beings; it was just your unfortunate lot in life. Discovered by humans in the Aleutian Islands in 1741, it took only 30 years to hunt you to extinction. Once again, I’m sorry, very sorry.
To the Florida panther, I repeat my tired refrain. I’m sorry. I’m sorry you’re on the brink of extinction. I’m sorry that human chemicals have caused sterility in so many of your males. To the California condor, I’m sorry that your numbers are so small, and that we had to imprison all of you in zoos to save the species. I’m sorry that there are so few of you that have successfully been reintroduced into the wild that you’re still one of the most endangered birds. To the spotted owl, I’m sorry. I’m sorry we keep cutting down the forests you depend on to survive. To the penguin, I apologize for global warming, and also to the polar bear. To the giant panda, I’m sorry. I’m sorry you’re at risk of extinction, and that so many humans think it’s appropriate and interesting to watch you try to mate, so that your mating cycle is often unsuccessful (I can’t blame you for not wanting to mate with all those strangers looking on – most of us don’t like to mate in public, either). To the orangutan, the chimpanzee, the mountain gorilla, and all the other great apes that are so eerily near-human – I’m so very, very sorry. I can’t understand how we can be so blind, so deaf, and so dumb to the plight of our nearest living relatives. To the Neanderthals, just in case we had any role in your demise, I say I’m sorry if we were at all responsible for the last of the Neanderthals. To the mastodon and the woolly mammoth, to the megafauna of the North American continent and the marsupials of the South American continent, to the vast richness of birds that are now gone forever from Hawai’i, and to all the many species of animals and plants that will once inhabited Europe and Asia, to the African savannah animals that exist no more, I’m sorry. On behalf of my species, I apologize sincerely to all of you.
I want to do more than apologize. I want to do something to stop all the carnage. I want the slaughter of the innocents to end, and I want to find a way for humans to meet their needs and live satisfying, fulfilling lives without having to cause the demise of other creatures who also depend on some of the same resources we are so rapidly depleting. I don’t want to see an endless string of apologies to the long dead for the stupid mistakes we made. It’s time for the apologies to stop. It’s time to quit thinking we can simply behave badly, say I’m sorry (sometimes several hundred years later), and expect everything to be all right. That’s a very juvenile behavior, and it’s time for our species to grow up. I’ve said the apologies for all of us, now it’s time for action. Let’s stop the killing before it’s too late.
FG
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