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  Faulking Around  -  Sep 27, 2004  -  Printable Version
- "The Secret Vonnegut Society" or "Subversion as an Art Form"
   by Mark Faulk

    A few months ago, my then fourteen year old daughter asked me about my favorite author of all time, Kurt Vonnegut. She had attended the lecture he gave at Oklahoma City University a few years ago (with my oldest daughter and myself), and I remember telling her at the time "You might not know much about him now, but in a few years, you'll be telling everyone you were here". She read the short story "Harrison Bergeron" just before we went, and we came away inspired and enthralled. It's true that I've read a few online "reviews" of the speech that were less than flattering, but that reflects a lot more on the lack of vision of the reviewers than Vonnegut's performance. He was brilliant, they are morons.    

    So, onward and upward: I've been "joking" that every time I turn around, I do something subversive, and this time was no different. At the age of fourteen, it was "time". My daughter was ready to be initiated into the world that belongs only to Kurt Vonnegut and those who have truly experienced him, the world of Wampeters, Fomas, and Granfalloons. There exists a secret society of Vonnegut devotees: either you "get it", or you don't. If you don't, well, don't bother calling those of us who do, or for that matter, don't even talk to us. And you can forget about learning the secret society handshake (here's a clue, it has nothing to do with hands, or physical contact of any kind, for that matter, so you can only imagine what you're missing out on). In other words, Vonnegut himself is a "Wampeter", which in Vonnegutese is defined as "an object such as the Holy Grail which is the focus of a karass , that is, around which the lives of many otherwise unrelated people may revolve."

    As I was saying, it was time. I carefully sifted through my Vonnegut library, some were old and dog-earred (as in, "almost as old as I am"), but most had been replaced many times over, loaned out to friends and family, never to be seen again. It didn't matter, it was reward enough to know that I had initiated some formerly unsophisticated neophyte into The Vonnegut Society. I considered the possibilities: Jailbird? No, a bit too leftfield for the uninitiated. Sirens of Titan? Too science fiction for the first read.

    Finally, I settled on the "Classic".

    Slaughterhouse-Five.

    I pulled it down, dusted it off, and gingerly handed it to my daughter. She took it to her room and closed the door. As much as I wanted to go in every half hour and ask, "Do you get it?", or "Isn't he the BEST writer eeeevver?", or maybe even a simple "What part are you reading now?", I knew instinctively that the first Vonnegut Experience was an intensely private affair. I kept my distance, pacing the floor like an expectant father. She read the book in less time than it takes many mothers to give birth. That was a good sign.

    When the door opened and she came out, I was afraid to ask the question. Was she one of "us", or would I be doomed to an eternity of living with a daughter that I couldn't relate to on any level whatsoever? I scarcely dared to breath. Did she like it, or more to the point: did she "love" it?

    We looked at each other, and she said simply, "I loved it. Which one should I read next?" It was a wonderfully bonding moment. There would be no need for a paternity test after all. Okay, she's pretty much exactly like me (but in a good way), so that was never an issue, but this isn't the time for understatement.

    I handed her the copy of Slapstick which I had been anxiously clutching, gave her a two minute synopsis, complete with hand gestures and Vonnegutesque social commentary, and she disappeared back into her room. My daughter was growing up.

    All was right with the world, my job as a father was complete. I was a rousing success. Or so I thought. Unfortunately, there's one more point I haven't covered yet: the "subversive" act I mentioned earlier. I had heard about the infamous "banned books list", a list compiled by the American Library Association (that bastion of subversion) to draw attention to the books that many cities, school boards, and various other right-thinking entities had banned from their midst in an effort to protect us from the dangers of "creative thinking". A good friend of mine emailed me this year's list, and there, along with The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, The Catcher in the Rye, To Kill a Mockingbird, Brave New World, Lord of the Flies, and, inexplicably, Where's Waldo?, was Slaughterhouse-Five.

    I had unknowingly corrupted my own daughter, tainted her, doomed her to a life of politically incorrect viewpoints, or, as I like to call it, "enlightened her". Good for me. She is one of us, and all the bombastic demagoguery in the world can't subvert her now. Hi ho.

And that, my fellow Vonnegutians, is the Faulking Truth.


"An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all." - Oscar Wilde



Editor's Note: This is the American Library Association's "Banned Book Week", from September 25th to October 1st. Read a Banned Book today! To see the list of "The 100 Most Frequently Challenged Books Of 1990-2000" (or, if you prefer, "The Must-Read List"), go to http://www.ala.org/ala/oif/bannedbooksweek/bbwlinks/100mostfrequently.htm


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Faulking Around Archives:
       Coming Out  (Mark Faulk, Mar 20, 2004)
       It's A Sick, Sick, Sick, Sick World  (Mark Faulk, June 1, 2004)
       Work Hard (And Other Observations of The Obvious)  (Mark Faulk, Jun 27, 2004)
       Paging Dr. Tharp  (Dr. Russell Tharp, Esquire, Aug 7, 2004)
       "Beating the Bushes" or "Do I Feel a Draft?"  (Mark Faulk, Sep 17, 2004)
       Running on Empty  (Mark Faulk, Sep 24, 2004)
       "Media Bias?" or "All the News That's Fit to Print"  (Mark Faulk, Sep 25, 2004)
       "The Secret Vonnegut Society" or "Subversion as an Art Form"  (Mark Faulk, Sep 27, 2004)
       FBI Response To Internet Scams: Don't Open Them  (Mark Faulk, Oct 6, 2004)
       Demise of the Writer  (Mark Faulk, Oct 17, 2004)
       President Bush's Second Term: The First Hundred Days  (Mark Faulk, April 30, 2005)
       In the Realm of Impossible Things.....  (Russell Tharp, Nov 7, 2004)
       How to Talk to a Liberal (if you must)  (Sean Faulk, Dec 3, 2004)
       Three Simple Words  (Mark Faulk, Dec 18, 2004)
       Wishing You the Bluest Sky  (Mark Faulk, Jan 1, 2005)
       Oooooh, Look at the Pretty Girl!  (Mark Faulk, Jan 8, 2005)
       An Open Letter to the Red States  (Robin Buckallew, Jan 18, 2005)
       Beauty From the Inside Out  (Russell Tharp, Feb 13, 2005)
       The Land Where Time (Almost) Stood Still  (Mark Faulk, Feb 22, 2005)
       Fear and Loathing in the 21st Century  (Mark Faulk, Feb 26, 2005)
       Give Peace Rallies a Chance  (Russell Tharp, Mar 22, 2005)
       The Flogging of America  (Mark Faulk, Mar 30, 2005)
       Stalking the Wild Beast  (Russell Tharp, Apr 12, 2005)
       Yesterday I was making fun of Republicans....now I are one  (Mark Faulk, Apr 20, 2005)
       American Idol Rigged? Who Cares?  (Mark Faulk, Apr 29, 2005)
       An Editor's Confession: Ken, I love you  (Mark Faulk, May 13, 2005)
       Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.....I watched American Idol  (Mark Faulk, May 25, 2005)
       Winning the War on Drugs.....One Cancer Patient at a Time  (Mark Faulk, Jun 6, 2005)
       Dateline Stockgate Expose': "Could Air Any Time"  (Mark Faulk, Jun 20, 2005)
       The Blanket......  (Russell Tharp, Jun 29, 2005)
       The News   (Down the Middle, Jul 16, 2005)
       Is Faulking Truth Editor "Closet Sexist"?  (Ima Feminist, Aug 9, 2005)
       Robertson and Chavez Reportedly Seen at Trendy Nightclub  (Mark Faulk, Aug 24, 2005)
       The Plastic President  (Mark Faulk, Sep 3, 2005)
       Crop Circles and Magic Beer Cans  (Mark Faulk, Oct 4, 2005)
       Two Lilies  (Russell Tharp, Oct 17, 2005)
       The Enemy in Our Living Room  (Mark Faulk, Nov 22, 2005)
       In His Own Write  (John Lennon, Dec 7, 2005)
       Christmas Combat  (Down The Middle, Dec 17, 2005)
       Let's Teach the Controversy  (Robin Buckallew, Dec 31, 2005)
       Woman is the Nigger of the World  (Mark Faulk, Mar 14, 2006)
       Our Elected Officials isn't Learning  (Mark Faulk, Apr 28, 2006)
       Welcome to Our Shangri-la   (Mark Faulk, May 6, 2006)
       It is a very mixed blessing to be brought back from the dead.  (Mark Faulk, Jun 5, 2006)
       A MySpace Moment: "The Defense of Marriage Act"  (Mark Faulk, Jun 7, 2006)
       And if you believe in Freedom...  (Mark Faulk, Jul 4, 2006)
       Elvis Parsley - "Thank you very much"  (Mark Faulk, Jul 10, 2006)
       Which one are you?  (Mark Faulk, Aug 2, 2006)
       Falling Upward....  (Mark Faulk, Nov 12, 2006)
       Two hearts beating as one  (Mark Faulk, Jan 4, 2007)
       My Story  (Darren Saunders, April 2, 2007 )
       Aranda in Final 20 of Lollapalooza Last Band Standing 2007  (Mark Faulk, Jul 9, 2007)
       John McCain: The Armageddon President  (Mark Faulk, Jun 5, 2008)
       It's your money, you paid for it!!!  (Mark Faulk, Nov 3, 2008)
       Tribute to a Lost Friend  (Robin Buckallew, Nov 1, 2009)
       Glenn Beck is a Sorry Escuse for a Mormon  (Ken Shade, Mar 14, 2010)
       WARNING! DO NOT READ THIS!  (Mark Faulk, Jul 8, 2010)










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