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Commentary Too - Apr 19, 2006 - Printable Version
- The Little Gingerbread Boy
by Robin Buckallew
It seems one can hardly pick up a newspaper or magazine these days, or engage in serious conversation with friends without being confronted by one looming crisis after another. Of course, we all know these crises - the Iraq War, Global Warming, Imminent Economic Collapse - all distilled, and appropriately presented or spoken about in capital letters and fearful tones. Many of these crises are indeed serious, and are indeed worthy of the great fear they are engendering. But is it possible that some of these things may be manufactured, and not crises at all? Most of us at least suspect as much, but feel helpless against the rising tide of hysteria that engulfs us. Unfortunately, in many of these manufactured crises, someone ends up getting hurt. Often, those who get hurt are the most innocent ones of all. These days, it seems not a single week goes by when I don't hear about some new crisis afflicting our children. Usually these crises have to do with some affliction, some medical condition previously perceived as occasional, that has suddenly become “epidemic”. We shake our heads, and look for the cause of the increasing incidences of childhood disorders. One of the chief disorders that is currently escalating out of control is a condition known as ADD - Attention Deficit Disorder. We are in the middle of a nationwide crisis, as our children become increasingly afflicted with this disorder. We hold medical meetings, and write articles in newspapers and medical journals. We look desperately for a cause - chemicals in the environment, too much TV, too much sugary cereal - and shake our heads in consternation that our children are so afflicted. But are they? I would like to share with you the story of the little gingerbread boy.
A number of years ago, a bright, energetic little five-year-old boy entered kindergarten. It was time, so the state said. He’s of the age where he must enter the educational system. And so, he started school eagerly yet anxiously, in the manner of most children. A couple of weeks later, his father received a call from the school. The teacher told him his son was suffering from attention deficit disorder. The child, it seems, had a great deal of energy. He preferred to sit under his desk rather than in it. He must be taken IMMEDIATELY to a doctor. The school told the father which doctor he should consult. The father, being used to accepting the word of such an authority figure, and concerned about his son, took him IMMEDIATELY to the doctor, who, sure enough, diagnosed him with attention deficit disorder, threw in an additional diagnosis of “absence seizures”, and prescribed daily medication. Breathing a sigh of relief that all would now be well, the father and the teacher went about the job of bringing up the little boy. Within a week of getting on the medication, the school again called the father. The teacher was irate. It seems the child was now sleeping through class. Could it be the medication, the father wondered? Oh, no, said the teacher (and the father). It couldn’t be the medication - we can’t take him off that - he’s so much easier to control now. And so, the little boy slept his way through grade school, the energy gone, the eagerness turned into languor, a featureless zombie who showed no more interest in life, in learning, or in playing. Another lucky child, saved from the despair of ADD and now a good little cookie-cutter conformist, able to be “controlled”, able to be taught how to be a proper citizen and consumer in the global society. A little gingerbread boy with little to distinguish him from other little gingerbread boys.
In America, medicating children has become the number one pastime. We are all worried that our children are sick - they don’t “obey” like they should, they run around and make lots of noise and seem unable to concentrate for long periods of time on the things that we want them to concentrate on. They sap our energy. They require our time. They whine and bicker and stomp their feet, acting rebellious and unruly. So, we diagnose them. This must be illness. Never mind that every generation of children from the beginning of time has had the same behaviors, adjusted somewhat for the times, of course, but essentially the same. We used to say “boys will be boys”, and send them to the sandlot to play baseball with the other boys, work off all that energy. Now, we say “all our kids are suffering from ADD”, and send them off to the doctor to come home with that cherished prescription in hand that will bring peace and calm into our home again. In short, we have converted the normal behaviors of childhood into a pathological condition. It is time to ask ourselves why. Why are we drugging our children, so that they slog through life in a lackluster manner, coming home from school to sit in front of the television or the computer, not running and playing, with no energy and no curiosity. Are the drugs really for the benefit of the child? Or are they for us? Meanwhile, the drug companies laugh all the way to the bank.
Yesterday, in the course of a group discussion, this question arose. The quick, immediate, and cold-water answer was “even if they don’t have ADD, the teachers need to be able to control the classroom”. No further discussion - subject closed. We can drug small children because their normal childhood behaviors are perceived as “disruptive”, and teachers need “control”. WHAT!?!? What was that I just heard? We can drug small children because teachers “need control”? We can turn bright children into dull conformists, because teachers “need control”? I would ask you, here and now, all of you, is this ethical? I challenge you to stand up, look in my eyes, the eyes of a mother who watched the light go out in the eyes of her little gingerbread boy, helpless to do anything about it, look into my eyes and tell me it is ethical to bring so much pain to so many parents and so many children everywhere just because a teacher “needs control”. It took me eight years to get my son off a medication he didn’t need, and that did him more harm than good. It took fighting and crying and dying inside for both of us before I was finally able to get him in to see the best pediatric neurologist in the state, who told me he did not have either ADD or the seizure disorder for which he was being medicated. Second opinions in this business of drugging children are rare; we are all too eager to get our children the “help” we assume they need to question whether they even need it at all.
We fight drug pushers and drug dealers worldwide, in Colombia and on the street corners of every ghetto, but we never question the wisdom of the drug pushers in our schools who tell us our children need to be medicated so they will conform to the expectations of an overtaxed school system. How ironic. The vast majority of American children are drugged, but we only worry about those who are smoking joints or sniffing powders. We teach them to do drugs to “feel better”, and then we object as they get older and they do the “wrong” drugs to “feel better”. I say, enough.
Underlying the civilized veneer of American society, there are a number of smoldering issues, just waiting for the right conditions to erupt and reveal the dark underbelly of our world. This is one of those issues. Many questions need to be asked and answered before we can properly deal with this issue. What are the actual goals of education? If, indeed, we decide that the proper role for our schools is to turn the children into conformists who will vote they way they “should” and buy the things they “should” and “follow the rules” without rocking the boat, then perhaps drugging them is permissible and even desirable. If the goal, however, is to educate them, to tap into their native abilities and interests, and guide them toward a satisfying and rewarding future, then put the drugs away. We need creative, innovative answers to this problem, not simple, one-size fits all, pill-based solutions. We might need to recognize that all children are different, and not all children are ready for school at the age of five - perhaps the gingerbread boy just needed another year to reach the proper level of maturity. We might need to recognize that an identical curriculum for all children is an ineffective way of educating, and that there needs to be recognition of the differences in background, in ability, and in interest. Perhaps education needs to be tailored to the needs of the child, to find out where he or she properly fits in society, rather than trying to force a square child into a round hole of societal “norms”. We might need to recognize that energy and enthusiasm are not pathological, especially in a growing, learning child, and develop new and innovative programs to address that energy and channel it, rather than medicate it out of existence. We might need to recognize that parenting is not supposed to be easy, and that we should find different ways to deal with our child’s energy, even if it means giving up a little bit more of ourselves even when we’re already tired. Otherwise, we might find ourselves wondering someday, as we stare into the dull, lifeless eyes of our beloved child, what happened to the little boy who used to run and play? Some day, this smoldering issue will erupt, and we will have to address it - like it erupted when two Ritalin-medicated youths took rifles into the school at Columbine, and tried to force us to examine our assumptions. Conversations following that incident were predictable: it was violent TV, it was violent video games, or it was inattentive parents. We never truly examined the underbelly of American societal expectations that try to force all children into a mold, and issue them labels and diagnoses when they don’t appear to fit.
Today, there are many crises in America. Many of these crises are real, many are quasi-real and not as large as they seem, and many are manufactured. I don’t mean to belittle the concerns of anyone who sees an epidemic of childhood pathology - their concerns are sincere, and need to be addressed. I do mean, however, to add a few extra layers to the discussion. Perhaps when we search for the answers to why our children have more disease these days, we should begin by researching whether the expectations of society have changed, not the children. Perhaps we should begin by asking ourselves what sort of future we actually want for our children. Perhaps we should begin by addressing the question of whether there really is an epidemic of ADD in our children, and if not, who benefits from the current hysteria. Let’s expand the discussion - is our desire simply to “control” our children? Or is our real desire to educate our children, to encourage their artistic, intellectual, and/or athletic natures? Is our main concern Wall Street, or Main Street? Think about it. Perhaps you’ve stared into the dying eyes of a little gingerbread boy. Perhaps you’ve cried yourself to sleep at night, wondering where your flamboyant, fun daughter went. Perhaps you, too, have known children who had the life snuffed out of them by well-meaning, harried parents and teachers who sought only to gain something that resembled control. Drugs are cheap and easily available - genuine solutions to complex problems take time, money and energy. It’s up to us to decide if our children are worth it, or if we’d rather spend the money and time on something else.
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